How did I get here? Again? I thought I was better. I remember back to the day when I woke up and realized my life wasn’t mine. That I had been allowing the people in my life to shape it because of my deep-seated fear of being alone; of disappointing anyone or pushing them away. … Continue reading Nothing Stays the Same
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I Am Scared
Success is a funny thing, isn’t it? First of all, who defines it? I hope the answer is you. You define it for yourself. Sure, we let all sorts of people and experiences influence how we define it, but at the end of the day, it’s you who has to live with your success. Do … Continue reading I Am Scared
Chapter 6: Religious Manipulation
I did not grow up in a religious house-hold. Allegedly, my family is Catholic. I remember going to some sort of kids class at the church on a weeknight growing up, I had a first communion, and there’s video proof I’ve been baptized, but to say my family is religious is just a wild exaggeration. … Continue reading Chapter 6: Religious Manipulation
Chapter 5: Dreams Don’t Come True
I am a big dreamer, in case you haven’t noticed! I always have been. I can remember laying awake at night imagining the things I’d achieve, the stages I’d perform on, the traveling I’d do, and the people I’d meet. Do you remember the first time you felt that gut-wrenching I-gotta-have-that sensation? Where you wanted … Continue reading Chapter 5: Dreams Don’t Come True
Chapter 4: Love Doesn’t Last
I fell in love when I was 11 years old. Go ahead… roll your eyes, throw the “yea right’s” at me, whatever! I totally did. I’m sure you all thought I was going to write about my divorce here. Surprise! Don’t get me wrong, I loved my ex-husband. But our story isn’t at all like … Continue reading Chapter 4: Love Doesn’t Last
Chapter 3: Bodies Fail
I was “that kid,” back in the day. You know the ones: naturally gifted at sports, got A’s without studying, excelled at everything without even trying. I am aware of how blessed I am in that regard, despite what I was going through with my caretakers. Looking back, it feels like a solid trade-off. I … Continue reading Chapter 3: Bodies Fail
Chapter 2: Love is Conditional
I’m a child of divorce. I know, I know, that’s such a common thing these days, but I don’t like that it is! And it doesn’t change the way it feels. Especially to a kid. Honestly, I thought I was one of the lucky ones. My parents have been divorced for as long as I … Continue reading Chapter 2: Love is Conditional
Chapter 1: Caretakers Don’t Always Take Care of You.
Chapter 1 of the Trust Series. Let's just come out with it. My first childhood memory? Repetitive sexual abuse from my baby-sitter's son. My well-being was daily entrusted to a woman with 5 children. Rightfully so, my parents believed this woman was fit to keep an eye on another one. And honestly, she probably was. … Continue reading Chapter 1: Caretakers Don’t Always Take Care of You.
Trust
I've been diligently avoiding writing this. It's the deepest of wounds, and the one that will likely give me the most freedom if I face it, yet it's the one I find myself doing everything I can possibly do to avoid it. Today alone I've cleaned every inch of my already clean apartment, did dishes … Continue reading Trust
Some posts are too long for Instagram…
It’s late. I know that. All the best marketers would tell you it’s too late to post something that’ll be effective. . But it’s not about that. It’s not about “being seen,” or gaining followers. It's about raw moments. It’s about real life. It’s about being human. . I’ve always been someone who carried this … Continue reading Some posts are too long for Instagram…